I added two to the list today so I decided it was time to make a public record of this list.
The absurd things I’ve said as a mother I never thought I’d say…
- Don’t spike the football off your brother’s head (12/20/10)
- We don’t drag our brother down the stairs (12/20/10 -good day, huh?)
- Don’t lick the doorknob (Carter was 2)
- Don’t drink that puddle (When Carter was 2 @ our old house)
- Don’t wipe your nose on the couch (Thanksgiving 2009)
- Don’t spit at your grandmother (Carter)
- We don’t open umbrellas in the car (Kiefer)
- “Hey! We don’t say hey!” (silly Mommy!)
- Don’t squish your brother in the refrigerator! (Dec. 2010)
- We don’t throw bricks at our brother (the cardboard kind, but it sounds good!) (Dec 2010)
- “We don’t eat off the floor like a dog.” (Griffin, Fall 2010)
- “We don’t use scissors to cut our brother’s hair!” (Carter cut Kiefer’s hair in our old house fall 2008) (I knew they were up to no good when they were playing quietly in the basement too long)
- “Don’t hit your brother on the head with a tractor!” (Kiefer slammed Carter in the head, there was even bloodshed) Fall 2010
- “Don’t jump out the window!” (I said to Carter when he was outside the sunroom and I was inside! Summer 2010)
- Don’t slam your brother’s head in the car door! (Dec. 2010)
- Don’t dust your brother (Jan 2011)